Yesterday my husband’s relative, Sir Dylan came to visit. I invited him in and made sure that he was well provided for. There was something strange about him and almost before the pleasantries were done with he blurted out that he was going to go out and search for “uncle” Garren’s remains, that has been missing for many a year now. Dylan proclaimed that it would be a fitting repayment for my husband’s generosity in insuring Dylan’s knighthood. I tried to persuade him that he should at least confer with my beloved husband before setting of but the idea had sunk it’s claws into his heart and he would not be deterred. Young Sir Dylan gather up what supplies he could and set of in the company of Sir Galran, who had been Sir Corwyn’s squire and knew about most of the clues that Corwyn had found whilst searching for his lost brother’s remains. I recognize my husband’s brashness in the young men’s actions.
My husband hasn’t returned home yet. We received news that the battle at Lindenpool had been enormous and bloody and that many had died. Lord Chillmark returned home last sunday however and he reassured me that Cadry had made it through the battle and had showered himself in glory. As if news of such things really matter to me. All I want is for my husband and the father of my children to return home safe to Tisbury.
Chillmark mentioned that both Ludwell and Cadry had ridden off after the battle chasing the fleeing saxons. Ludwell had apparently been in such a state after that the battle that he had been raving about butchering every last saxon, including women and children and some men had listened. I fear that brute. Since the death of poor Anwyn he has been touched in the head and apparently thinks that the christian god is speaking to him. I mostly think it’s his own bloodlust that speaks to him and that he mistakes it for the voice of the gods. Why my husband counts that man as a friend I will never understand. I truly hope that his son fares well wherever he is being kept these days.
Fortunately, my husband seems to have ridden with prince Madoc instead, and Cadry told Chillmark to tell me that my love had finally found information that pointed to the hiding place of the fenris saxons. He has always prevailed in combat before, but from what I was told he had already been injured in the battle. I do hope he doesn’t get himself killed.
We had to wait for the winter storms to pass before we could leave London and travel home to Salisbury. The mood at court these last few weeks have been oppressive ever since the duke of Cornwall and his wife left the court without the Kings permission. I am glad to leave with my husband and the rest of the Salisbury men. I have done my best to keep up appearances before my husband and the others, but they notice that something is of. Hopefully they will think it is general unease and missing my home and not the fact that my mother was the one to help Duke Gorlois and Duchess Ygraine by using her sorcery. Mother was always keen on involving herself in the doings of the great and powerful. I wonder if she has more of her “daughters” stashed here at court?
I wonder what her game is? She was never very forthcoming about the greater picture, neither with me or my sisters. On the other hand, she never birthed any of us, just raised us to be her servants and scouts, so how much could we really expect from her. Her interest in Merlin’s doings was after all the reason she sent me to Hillfort. I wonder if she had planned for what happened next? Did she know that Cadry would fall heedlessly in love with me or is that something that she conjured up? All I know in the end is that I have come to love him more than I ever thought possible. This is the man who braved the court of the Princess of Twilight to win me back. I don’t like to dwell on that time though I can’t remember much. The one thing I do remember is the promise made, that our first daughter will go to her court when she is old enough. I almost wish that if we are blessed with more children they will all be boys.
A few weeks after our return home a messenger arrived with a message from a saxon named Lifstan. The messenger, who is called Brandir, was a prisoner taken by the Saxons during last year’s raids. He was an archer in the service of the Count of Salisbury. The Saxons have crushed his hand so he will never fire a bow again. My husband rewarded the man richly for carrying the message, a lot more than a message was worth but I think my husband took pity on him in some small manner.
The Saxon Lifstan proclaimed that he is a cousin to Saexwulf, leader of the Fenris clan, who is the son of the fearsome warrior Sigeberht. The saxon prisoner my husband brought with him from London is apparently the nephew of this Lifstan. Lifstan demanded that the prisoner be released without an exchange of ransom or else he would take it upon himself to hunt down my husband and slay him personally.
My husband makes of show of disregarding the treat and he acts as if nothing has changed, but I can tell that his hatred for the Saxons burns brighter and hotter with every year. I fear that this last threat might finally have pushed him over some kind of line where he will not know when to stop fighting and killing them. I suggested to my husband in the privacy of our own bed that maybe he should consider handing over the old giant’s blade that his father had claimed as plunder from the warrior Sigeberth to perhaps end this bloodfeud. My husband grew wroth and in no uncertain terms told me that he would show any weakness towards the Saxons because that would only convince them to come after us all the more. He stated that he would do what it takes to kill this Lifstan if he ever comes after us and if Saexwulf ever dared come for his father’s blade he would die like his father at the tip of a Cellydon weapon. I managed to calm down my husband by taking his mind of the Saxons and turning his thoughts and body towards making more children. After we had finished copulating I couldn’t fall asleep though. This war worries me beyond words even though the knights of Logres won a great victory this last summer. Will it ever truly end once and for all?